Good Girls premiere recap: I’d Rather Be Crafting

<em>Good Girls </em>premiere recap: I’d Rather Be Crafting

In reality it’s been 11 months since we’ve seen our Girls, but when the second season of Good Girls opens, it’s the morning after Beth had to make a Sophie’s Choice between shooting Dean, her cancer-free, lying, cheating, husband and father of her children, and Rio, her hoodie-wearing, smoldering hot, Worst Boss Ever who’s led her down a dangerous, yet titillating path of criminal activity. I mean, frankly, as the episode title suggests, at this moment, I’d rather be crafting, too.

But before the big reveal of Beth’s choice, we see her arriving home, anxious, with a trunkful of cleaning supplies. A nosy neighbor out for her morning fitness routine is both annoyed that a stop sign by Beth’s house has been stolen and curious as to which of Beth’s children made a mess this time. “Me,” Beth tells her without a trace of irony before heading inside to rid her dining room rug of a massive blood stain.* During a break from scrubbing, she casually takes a sip from her “I’d rather be crafting” mug, but when she returns it to the coaster (blood stains = meh, coffee rings = unacceptable), there are smudges of blood smeared on the white ceramic.

The episode cuts to 12 hours earlier with Annie and Greg making out like teenagers in a parked car with foggy windows. They’re speaking Spanish and slurring their words, presumably drunk on alcohol and the intoxication of their affair. You just know that like so many relationships born from the upholstered seat of a beater, this is going to be no bueno.

At Ruby and Stan’s house, Stan is making up the couch because there is no way he’s going to sleep in the same bed as his wife, the criminal. Ruby makes a valiant pitch for forgiveness and at least a small opening in the emotional wall her husband is building around himself, but Stan continues laying heavy bricks, instead. “What do you want here, Ruby?” he asks angrily. “You wanna act like nothing’s wrong? Wanna cuddle? You wanna watch reality TV? Well, guess what, baby? I’m living it. All those nights you slept like a baby right next to me with your shady, lying ass,” he seethes. Even after Ruby tries to defend herself, he doesn’t want to hear it. She watches, both exasperated and in shock as Stan pulls his gun out and cocks it before sliding it under his pillows. When she questions why he’s doing that, Stan tells her, “Because you and your girlfriends thought you could put a gang away. They made bail.”

Back at Beth’s house in the moment we last saw her at the end of the first season, we see the scene unfolding as though we’ve come in behind Beth. Framed pictures now lay shattered on the floor, things are knocked over, and Beth’s purse is on the floor, her phone spilling out as Ruby continues to call her to try and warn Beth of the danger that’s sitting at her dining room table.

As Rio cruelly asks her if she thinks she has what it takes, Dean tells her to shoot him. She doesn’t want to believe the gun is loaded, but Rio tells her she can tell that it is because of the weight of the clip — it adds a full pound. “Or you can just pull the trigger,” Dean urgently reminds her. With the gun still pointed in his direction, Rio gets up from the table and moves casually towards Beth, taking the gun away. He gently moves her hair to the side as he tells her she did her best. He caresses her chin and she looks both relieved and enamored. Their moment is interrupted by a sniffling Dean, who realizes in that instant that he’s lost his wife. And, then, in a flash, Rio turns and shoots him. “Now we’re good, darling,” Rio finishes.

The action cuts to a hospital waiting room where everyone is moving in fast-forward around Beth as she stays complete motionless in the middle of the couch. Finally, the silence is broken when Ruby notices Annie eating a fruit cup that she stole off a cart. Appalled that her friend would steal from the patients, the ridiculous argument is enough to bring Beth out of her state of shock in a fit of inappropriate laughter that spills forth like water through a dam. Her fit of hysterics continues as Annie asks if she’s laughing or crying and Ruby asks if she’s happy or sad. Before Beth can even figure out where she lands, the doctor comes in and I laugh out loud when Ruby offers, “She’s really upset” because clearly, she’s anything but. But she’s certainly about to be as the doctor tells her that though he has a long road ahead, Dean will be just fine. Beth doesn’t bother hiding her disappointment as the doctor leaves her to ruminate the fact that she didn’t, in fact, kill her husband. “Yaaaaay!” Annie offers with hilariously feigned enthusiasm. “He’s gonna kill me,” Beth says matter-of-factly.

(Recap continues on next page…)

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